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Chocolate Is My Favorite Health Food
Finally, the medical world has caught up with what the rest of us have known all the time, namely, chocolate is good for us. And I for one think it is about time. According to recent medical research, chocolate has marvelous benefits for the human body. Who in their right mind did not know this? As a subscriber to the Old England Journal of Homemade Cures and Potions, I have known for a very long time that the consumption of chocolate carries with it healthy advantages. For years, this journal carried many delicious articles touting the benefits of chocolate. And I have eaten it all up not to mention several boxes of chocolate.
This introduces me to a disturbing thought. I’m grateful for the advancement of modern medicine and science but what I want to know is simply this: if the medical world was mistaken about chocolate, what else are they mistaken about? Could it be that my long-time suspicions about broccoli are right? Has the medical world, which boasted for years about the dietary benefit of broccoli, been wrong all these years? With recent discoveries, I think this is a real possibility. I have been saying for years that broccoli was bad for you and chocolate was good for you. It seems I have been half right and I suspect another few years will prove I am 100 percent right on both subjects. Because I have been right about chocolate, I’m not going to take the chance I’m wrong about broccoli.
I propose to eat as much chocolate as possible and avoid broccoli in any and every form. In light of these recent discoveries concerning chocolate, I thought I would lend my expertise on the subject of how to eat chocolate. Because many people have for so long been under the delusion that chocolate was not healthy, most people do not know how to eat chocolate. I offer myself as an expert on the art of eating chocolate and I have the empty boxes to support my boast. Before giving my tips on eating chocolate, let me just say that the chocolate chip cookie is the basic host for chocolate for the novice chocolate eater. Each chocolate chip cookie carries the proper amount of chocolate for the person denied chocolate all these years. So, start out with a chocolate chip cookie to make sure you’re on the safe side of this issue. To know the proper amount of cookies, take your weight divided by your height (in inches) and multiplied by your age. This formula never fails. Because chocolate is rather a new food category for most people, let me offer a few tips as you begin the marvelous discovery of the chocolate world.
1. When you begin eating chocolate, make sure you do it one bite at a time. This is important. Do not succumb to the temptation of taking double or triple bites as you begin. Down the road as you become more adapt at eating chocolate you might grow into this facet of chocolate eating. 2. If you have a wrapped chocolate bar, remember, it must be unwrapped and allowed to breathe like a fine wine. Many people yield to the temptation of ripping open a candy bar and immediately taking a bite. This is wrong. Chocolate is delicate and must be nurtured carefully in order to enjoy its flavor to its fullest for the longest period of time.
3. When it comes to chewing chocolate, a person must be very careful. Each bite of chocolate must be chewed no less than 12 times out of respect for the cacao seed that sacrificed itself for your toothsome treat. Eating chocolate is a slow, reverent and loving experience. Perhaps the reason so many thought chocolate was not good for a person is that they ate it too fast. I once tried chewing a chocolate bar only 11 times and choked. I learned my lesson the hard way and I now wholly respect the delicate nature of chocolate. 4. One final tip I feel is quite important. Chocolate should always be eaten when you are alone for a very important reason.
When a person is eating chocolate, his full concentration should be on the process of eating and enjoying the rich chocolaty flavor. Any distractions, even the presence of a loved one, diverts from the whole experience. When you stop to think about this whole chocolate business, it is almost like a religious experience. As religious experiences go, the only genuine experience centers on knowing God, as he desires to be known. When it comes to religion, most people rush through without giving it much thought. And of course, they really never get to experience the full benefit of their religious experience. David understood this concept when he wrote, “Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.” (Psalms 46:10 KJV.) In this rat race of a world, it is almost impossible to find the time or the place to get still enough to really experience the presence of God.
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